Learning to love myself...finally!!

The month of February holds a lot of significance to me, especially this year.  This time last year, i was paying my "debt to society" or at least Milwaukee County. Basically, i wasn't a free woman.  That is behind me now, and Ive been doing my darnedest to maintain an upbeat outlook on life while living soberly.  February is also Eating Disorder awareness month.  After 15 years of struggle and torment, i am slowly starting to have the demon named "ED" leave my side.  He creeps back now and then, and when he does he comes strong and with a vengeance.  Running and really throwing myself into fitness has started to help conquer that voice that tells me i don't need to "refuel" my body.  Lastly, this is my birthday month! Tomorrow i turn 27. holy moly. My life definitely took a different direction and path then i had expected, but my past has shaped me into the woman i am today.  Ive had a lot of tough battles, whether it be my eating disorder, a past drug addiction and alocholism, i have started to make it through all of these.  God doesn't give you what you cant handle. 

That being said, onto the running rambles! Ive actually got quite a handful of runs to blog.  Ill try to just keep it basic and get the times out there.  I have one run from January that i didn't blog; Jan 26th. I ran 3.03miles in 20:49 with an average pace of 6'52"pm  M1:6'56"  M2:6'49"  M3:6'49" 
My totals for January:  Total Miles: 38.1  Total time: 4:31.06  Average overall Pace: 7'06"

The month of February, i made a pact to myself that i would run more.  Last week, i set a goal on my Nike plus to run 20miles (minimum) each week for the next 16 weeks.  The more miles i can log per week the better, as long as i make sure to not over exert myself and am cautious about my knee. 

Alright, February runs:
Feb 4: Ran 4.12miles in 28:14 with avg pace of 6'50"  (This run was at 604AM, the week i was motivated to get in early gym workouts)  M1:6'51" M2:6'45" M3:6'50" M4:6'55"

Feb 5: (515am) Ran 4.13miles in 27:33 with an avg pace of 6'40" (nice improvement from day prior)
M1:6'45" M2:6'40" M3:6'42" M4:6'33"

Feb 6: (534am) Ran 4.05miles in 27:01 with an avg pace of 6'40"   M1:6'44" M2:6'42" M3:6'38" M4:6'34"

then i took 3 days off from the gym completely

Feb 11: Ran 3.02miles in 19:57 with an avg pace of 6'36"  M1:6'48" M2:6'32" M3:6'24"

Feb 12:  I did not run, instead, i did an hour on the StairMaster ending it with 8.08miles and 30minutes on the bike completing 12.88miles

Feb 13:  The weather was nice this day, 43degrees and super sunny! :) So, i bundled up a bit and ran outside.  I couldn't let a nice day slip away. 
I ran 3.02 miles in 19:58 with an avg pace of 6'36" M1:6'55" M2:6'34" M3:6'18  This run was almost identical to the day prior, it had a one second difference; I also was against the elements such as winds and different running conditions including inclines and downhills.  I did a cool down run of 1.12miles.  I normally do not log my cool downs as i don't want them to affect my overall average time; Normally I walk them on the treadmill, however, being outside, i logged this one to make sure i did in fact cool down for 1mile.

Feb 14: Valentines day! I was at work from 730am-915pm so i didn't work out.  i even had the chance to actually have dinner with someone and had to cancel because i was stuck at work so long and exhausted at the end of the night

Feb 15: I did not run this day either, but, i did start Yoga! Every Friday night i will be doing an hour yoga class.  It was amazing.  I have never done Yoga before and i am stunned at myself that i haven't.  The instructor kept mentioning advanced moves and looking at me each time, and i was actually able to do them, and quite well. I left the class feeling very pleased with myself and with that sore feeling I've grown to love. Of course, i went straight to the gym after yoga. Did an hour on the stair master getting in a bit over 8 miles.

Feb 16: Again, I took the day off from running. I had a long day at work and wasn't feeling the treadmill. I did an hour on the stair master getting in 8.32miles and did a 30 minute bike getting in 7.65. Being an "Arm Day" after my cardio i lifted for about 45 minutes.

 
Feb 17: I actually had a really great Sunday. Woke up to a friend I haven't spoken to in ages asking if I wanted to go to an AA meeting with him. It was a good meeting and I am glad I went. Afterwards, I went for a run, outside! It was 22degrees out but the sun was shining and I couldn't resist the opportunity to run along Lake Michigan.
Ran 6.12miles in 41:36 with an avg pace of 6'47" M1:6'58" M2:6'58" M3:6'53" M4:6'48" M5:6'42" M6:6'25" I felt great after that run. It's really awesome how I can tell my lungs are clearing out from quitting smoking. Breathing in that fresh air felt so amazing, especially knowing I wasn't going add any unnecessary pollution afterwards.

Monday the 18th I took as a rest day. Went to another meeting and had lunch with a friend. Tuesday the 19th, I didn't have much time to work out. I had plans to go out to an early dinner with my Dad to celebrate my birthday. I was able to get in a 7milr run though. I had been hoping to do 9 but I just didn't have the time.
Ran 7.00miles in 46:10 with an avg pace of 6'35" M1:6'58 M2:6'43" M3:6'45" M4:6'21" M5:6'20" M6:6'23" M7:6'36"
I was pleased with that run. Around mile 4 I started to feel my knee nagging at me, so maybe its good I didn't have time for those 2 extra miles.

Today's workout was much less. It was solely a cardio day. I ran 3.03miles in 20:40 with an avg pace of 6'49" M1:6'47" M2:6'48" M3:6'53" halfway thru mile 1 i started feeling my knee again but decided that I would push myself to finish a 5K (my minimum) after the 3miles I reduced the speed to an 720per mile pace and cooled off with a 2 mile run. Then i did the stair master for 20 min or 2.89miles and then finished with a 33min bike or 8.70 mile bike. Tomorrow I might actually take a rest day, give my knees a break as go buy myself a new outfit to wear to my "birthday dinner" :)

Feb to date: 35.6miles total time: 3:59'48" overall avg pace: 6'43" and in keeping with the goal i set on Sunday of 20 miles per week, this week I'm at 16.15miles. Yeay!

Until next time, may you push through your mind telling you to stop and conquer your goals